I Deserve an ESPY for Having an Aspies Brother

    Every year ESPN hosts a ceremony that presents athletes that have excelled in sports with awards.  Most of these individuals have prevailed over adversity , remained focused under pressure, and have been training for years.  Anyone that has lived with someone that has Asperger Syndrome knows that  it is a marathon sport.

     My younger brother has a form of Autism called Asperger Syndrome.  People with this diagnosis are often referred to as Aspies in the autism community.  Individuals with this disorder can have symptoms of:

• Having difficulty or anxiety with social situations
• Becoming over-focused on a single item and want to know everything about this topic
• Unusual repetitive body movements
• Having problems with eye contact, facial expression, and gestures
• Clumsiness

   My brother is  labeled as "weird" or "strange" by others.  A recent outing to a Royal Oak restaurant for his birthday celebration is a perfect example of why people view Aspies in this manner. 

   The event started with the fact that it was a beautiful summer evening to eat on a patio and enjoy the scenery of downtown Royal Oak.  However, our party had to sit inside the dark venue because my brother is easily over stimulated and has anxiety with social situations. After we had settled into our seats, he began to look over the beverage menu and became fixated on the Mexican beers.  He asked the waitress 101 questions about the beers.  This continued for 5 minutes until she started to get testy.  I interjected with the suggestion that she bring a flight, but the bar did not offer one.  It was agreed for her to just bring her personal favorite selection.  Between the general social interaction of the outing and the interlude with the waitress, he needed to calm himself down, so he began "stimming".  Stimming is when an autistic person does a repetitive motion in order to calm them self.  In my brothers case, this is crumpling as many napkins as he can get his paws on. 
   It is a tradition for his birthday that I take a picture of just him.  I have always found it interesting that he never has eye contact with the camera, a typical sign of Asperger Syndrome.  This year, I asked him to pose with the beer that was an ordeal to order. Also, I wanted to capture the beautiful cashmere mock shirt that he was wearing since that was his gift from my husband and I. While posing, he clumsily dropped the beer.  On the way down to the ground, it spilled all over him and my father who had the  pleasure of sitting next to him.  The dropping of the beer started a public panic attack.

   In my pre-teen years, this scene would have sent me into tears of embarrassment.  However, after 3 decades of learning to cope with an Asperger Syndrome brother and gaining an education about the disorder, I just laughed.  I would say that this recent scene definitely qualifies me for an Aspies ESPY.

Success of the Day: Realizing how much I have matured

Pink Inspiration: The pink shade on my father's face as he held in his anger after having beer spilled on him

My Summer with an Albino

During high school,  I worked as a lifeguard at the local city pool.  While working there I was fascinated by a young man.  He was older and in college...  no this not a crush.  I was seduced by curiosity.  He looked like an albino...with his pale white skin, platinum blond hair, and aquamarine blue eyes.  The albino was thin,very athletic, and had the intelligence that you would expect from an University of Michigan undergrad.  He was also a vegan.

Since it was the mid 1990's, vegan was not an everyday term like it is today. I looked forward to having the same lunch break as him.  We both packed our own lunches and ate together while I drilled him about being a vegan. He explained to me that his diet consisted of no animal products.  I would watch him consume exotic nuts like soy and brazilian...up until this point the only nuts I knew about were Planter's peanuts and the special jar of cashews my father received as a gift during the holidays.  One time, I thought I would totally stump the albino by asking him about honey.  That technically is not an animal product, right?  He maintained that he does not eat honey because it comes from a living thing and ate agave nectar instead. (My thoughts...."Agave nectar. What? Weird!")

While the albino was eating nuts, fresh fruit, veggies and protein packed grains that I could not pronounce I was eating my brown bag staples.  This was packaged low fat turkey, light Wonder bread, prepackaged baby carrots and a piece of fruit.  He would educate me about how bad eating processed and packaged foods was for the body and the environmental consequences of animal farming.  At this point in my life, I had already removed beef and pork from my diet.  How could he ask more from me!  I thought he was just going through a crazy college kid phase.

Fast forward fifteen years...while adding walnuts and agave nectar to my morning oatmeal, I remembered the albino.  He had not crossed my mind in over decade.  I had realized that over time I had become more like him than I ever thought I would. Weird!

Success of the Day: Remembering to not judge others because one day you may become like them

Pink Inspiration: The pink tint of the albino's skin that peeked out from beneath the thick layer of chemical free titanium dioxide sunscreen on his face